It's hard for me to imagine that I'll have my little girl in my arms at this time on Monday...just three days from now.
I'm so excited to see her little face, touch her velvety soft skin, take in her fresh baby scent, hold her close to me and love on her for eternity.
I can't wait to introduce her to her brother, who will be a totally awesome big brother - he's got a good role model since his daddy was a pretty awesome big brother, too.
I look forward to staring in awe at her right beside my loving husband, her daddy.
I'll pray for her and tell her all about her other Daddy, too - the God of the universe who created her, knit her together in my womb, and has a place for her in this world.
There are so many people who already love her and have been looking forward to this day. Her Mimi, Papa, Grandma, Grandpa, Granddaddy, Nana, Ee-oo, Nay-nay, Kaitlyn, Patrick, Aunt B, GG, and so many others. She already has 2 best friends, Anya and Keira, and a boyfriend, Caleb, all born in the past few weeks.
She is loved more than words can express. My heart is overflowing.
Friday, October 21, 2011
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Birthday sweetness
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| A birthday kiss for Mommy :) |
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| Xander's gift to Mommy :) |
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| Xander is such a good helper! |
Confessions
I have to admit - I'm pretty miserable right now. I don't feel like I can do anything that doesn't cause pain. I think, "I'll just lay down for a minute" and either my hips, back, stomach, chest, etc. hurts! I think, "I'll just take a walk" and my hips, pelvis, legs or feet ache tremendously. I think, "I can cook dinner tonight" and by the time I'm finished with it, I'm useless for the rest of the night. I think, "I have all these things I want to do before Amelia Jayne is born" and I get a small fraction of those things accomplished.
I'm feeling pretty useless these days. Especially when I have a day like yesterday.
I lost it yesterday. Like, really lost it. I yelled at Xander. Like, really yelled. I've never done that before. He was exasperating me, repeating everything I said instead of answering my questions. He was tired which complicated matters, made him more emotional and needy. I didn't have much to give yesterday. So I yelled at him. He cried. I cried. It was awful. As a wise friend told me, "He'll forget about it," and I believe that and I'm thankful that God erases sin and gives comfort to the needy, but I don't know that I'll forget so easily. I felt (and still feel) terrible about the way I acted out in anger toward my two year old child who can't control his emotions and doesn't understand his own needs yet.
Sigh.
Life will get better. I know this. It's less than a week now when I will no longer be pregnant. I will hold my sweet little girl in my arms (instead of in my body) and be able to share her with others, too.
Right now I'm feeling emotional and drained. Oh and did I mention I have a cold? And so does Xander. Thanks for your prayers, friends. And thanks for letting me be honest about what I'm going through. Life isn't all bad by any means. There are still good and happy moments. But in 6 days, I hope to see many more of those. :)
I'm feeling pretty useless these days. Especially when I have a day like yesterday.
I lost it yesterday. Like, really lost it. I yelled at Xander. Like, really yelled. I've never done that before. He was exasperating me, repeating everything I said instead of answering my questions. He was tired which complicated matters, made him more emotional and needy. I didn't have much to give yesterday. So I yelled at him. He cried. I cried. It was awful. As a wise friend told me, "He'll forget about it," and I believe that and I'm thankful that God erases sin and gives comfort to the needy, but I don't know that I'll forget so easily. I felt (and still feel) terrible about the way I acted out in anger toward my two year old child who can't control his emotions and doesn't understand his own needs yet.
Sigh.
Life will get better. I know this. It's less than a week now when I will no longer be pregnant. I will hold my sweet little girl in my arms (instead of in my body) and be able to share her with others, too.
Right now I'm feeling emotional and drained. Oh and did I mention I have a cold? And so does Xander. Thanks for your prayers, friends. And thanks for letting me be honest about what I'm going through. Life isn't all bad by any means. There are still good and happy moments. But in 6 days, I hope to see many more of those. :)
Friday, October 7, 2011
Preschool
It just occurred to me that I haven't posted about Xander's preschool experience yet! He's been going for five weeks now. He goes once a week on Tuesdays. I'm so proud of him! Each day we've gone he's been so excited to be there. Here was the first day's experience:
We pulled into the parking lot, I got him out of his seat, I gave him his lunchbox, he grabbed my hand and said, "I hold Mommy's hand in the road," (::sigh:: Such a big boy!!) we walked to the door, went in and looked at the fish tank for a couple of minutes, walked down the hall to his room, found his name and left his bag and lunchbox there, and he walked right in! I had to remind him to give me a kiss.
He has been so eager and ready to get into his classroom and play! When I pick him up at 1pm he's usually playing with cars, tractors, blocks, or out on the playground. His teachers usually tell me he's pretty tired at the end of the day, but his behavior is still very good. I'm sure he does much more active things at school than he does with his 9-month pregnant mommy.
I'm so thankful that he loves it! After the first couple of times, I asked him to tell me what he does and the only things he would tell me were that he "plays ground" which I finally figured out meant he played on the playground :), he plays with cars and trucks, and he sings "The ABC song" during circle time. Now he's come home singing songs that I don't recognize, so I know he learned them in preschool. He sings the blessing, "God Our Father" and a song called "Icky Bicky Bumblebee." His teachers told me that he sings "Twinkle Twinkle" and "The ABC song" a lot, too. They've been making each letter of the alphabet each week. We're up to "D" now. Xander absolutely loves this and carries his letters around the house all the time. He loves the alphabet!
This week I asked him to tell me who his friends are at school - he said "Ms. Jean and Ms. Lindsey" who are, of course, his teachers! Haha! It's so funny to me how much he prefers the company of adults to other children.
I'll post some pics from his first day of school as soon as I get them off my camera which is not in my possession right now.
We pulled into the parking lot, I got him out of his seat, I gave him his lunchbox, he grabbed my hand and said, "I hold Mommy's hand in the road," (::sigh:: Such a big boy!!) we walked to the door, went in and looked at the fish tank for a couple of minutes, walked down the hall to his room, found his name and left his bag and lunchbox there, and he walked right in! I had to remind him to give me a kiss.
He has been so eager and ready to get into his classroom and play! When I pick him up at 1pm he's usually playing with cars, tractors, blocks, or out on the playground. His teachers usually tell me he's pretty tired at the end of the day, but his behavior is still very good. I'm sure he does much more active things at school than he does with his 9-month pregnant mommy.
I'm so thankful that he loves it! After the first couple of times, I asked him to tell me what he does and the only things he would tell me were that he "plays ground" which I finally figured out meant he played on the playground :), he plays with cars and trucks, and he sings "The ABC song" during circle time. Now he's come home singing songs that I don't recognize, so I know he learned them in preschool. He sings the blessing, "God Our Father" and a song called "Icky Bicky Bumblebee." His teachers told me that he sings "Twinkle Twinkle" and "The ABC song" a lot, too. They've been making each letter of the alphabet each week. We're up to "D" now. Xander absolutely loves this and carries his letters around the house all the time. He loves the alphabet!
This week I asked him to tell me who his friends are at school - he said "Ms. Jean and Ms. Lindsey" who are, of course, his teachers! Haha! It's so funny to me how much he prefers the company of adults to other children.
I'll post some pics from his first day of school as soon as I get them off my camera which is not in my possession right now.
Interesting info...
This is a great post by my friend, Patrick, about the One Campaign.
I love the Tiny Prints website and I just found their DIY blog! Awesome!
I've known about Etsy for awhile, but never really looked at the site. It's way cool!
I saw a friend's facebook post about Mi Esperanza. Looks like a great ministry and an amazing way to help out women in poverty.
My birthday was yesterday. It was awesome. David and I celebrated on Wed night by going out to Fleming's (we had gift cards :)) and having the "Memorable Meal for Two" - it was delicious! I wish I could have done more, but I've been so tired lately that dinner was about all I could handle. We were supposed to baby-sit a little girl last night, but she was sick, so we got to spend the evening together, just the two of us! Again, I had grandiose ideas of going to a movie (we have more gift cards :)) but by the time I got home from work I was pretty exhausted. That's kind of my life these days...exhaustion. So we had a simple dinner and lounged together in the living room. That's kind of my way of celebrating anyway - I'm a really good lounger/relaxer :).
I'm 37 weeks pregnant today - officially considered full-term!
I love the Tiny Prints website and I just found their DIY blog! Awesome!
I've known about Etsy for awhile, but never really looked at the site. It's way cool!
I saw a friend's facebook post about Mi Esperanza. Looks like a great ministry and an amazing way to help out women in poverty.
My birthday was yesterday. It was awesome. David and I celebrated on Wed night by going out to Fleming's (we had gift cards :)) and having the "Memorable Meal for Two" - it was delicious! I wish I could have done more, but I've been so tired lately that dinner was about all I could handle. We were supposed to baby-sit a little girl last night, but she was sick, so we got to spend the evening together, just the two of us! Again, I had grandiose ideas of going to a movie (we have more gift cards :)) but by the time I got home from work I was pretty exhausted. That's kind of my life these days...exhaustion. So we had a simple dinner and lounged together in the living room. That's kind of my way of celebrating anyway - I'm a really good lounger/relaxer :).
I'm 37 weeks pregnant today - officially considered full-term!
Beautiful weather...awesome weekend
Last weekend was beautiful! I love when the temps stay in the 60s for the high...ahhh...fall is in the air! We have spent a lot of time outdoors over the past few days.
David and Xander went uptown and rode the train on Saturday while I went to my friend, Crystal's, baby shower. Here are some pics from their adventures.
Sunday we celebrated Patrick's 6th birthday. My sister hosted at her house with a chicken stew supper, lots of friends and family, and a fun game of tag (in which I did not participate).
My sister is such a great hostess! She had lovely decorations, beautiful flowers, the food was yummy and perfectly displayed. I'm so proud of her! We ended the evening with a bonfire while Patrick opened presents. It was a great day! I think Patrick really enjoyed his birthday. :)
David and Xander went uptown and rode the train on Saturday while I went to my friend, Crystal's, baby shower. Here are some pics from their adventures.
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| On the platform, waiting for the train. |
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| Still waiting... |
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| There it is! |
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| Playing on the typewriter letters outside of ImaginOn. |
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| Here comes the train! |
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| There it is! |
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| Cool. |
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| Telling Scout all about the train. |
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| Time to go. |
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| Just one last look... |
My sister is such a great hostess! She had lovely decorations, beautiful flowers, the food was yummy and perfectly displayed. I'm so proud of her! We ended the evening with a bonfire while Patrick opened presents. It was a great day! I think Patrick really enjoyed his birthday. :)
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Festival in the Park
Last weekend Charlotte had its annual Festival in the Park at Freedom Park. David and I decided to brave it with Xander this year - our first time going with him. It was quite fun! It rained most of the day, except while we were actually at the park - awesome! And Xander hadn't napped in a couple of days at that point, but he actually handled things very well.
We bought fair food and had a picnic, walked around to all the booths with artwork, crafts, and information, watched people dance on the stages and heard some live music performances. Overall it was a great time - I would do it again. Next year we'll have an 11-month old to add to the mix...we'll see how I feel about that when the time comes around again at this time next year. :)
Here are some pics of Xander playing on the playground and riding the train (with Scout, of course!).
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