Acting like a 2-year-old

It's been an interesting year so far.
We've been through a stomach bug, some colds, snowmageddon, plus I hurt my back early in February which took a good week, if not more, to get over. Thanks to my husband and Mom who really helped me out during that time.

Life is always challenging, but it's been a bit more than usual lately. Obviously the aforementioned calamities, but also some new challenges with my babies...and ultimately with my controlling nature.

Amelia Jayne is two. She's acting it. I think I expect more from her than I should because I keep forgetting she's so little. I did the same with Xander. They're so smart, and big kids for their age. Plus, Amelia Jayne has Xander who seems to make her feel older to me, too. She has phrases that he never would have at that age simply because he didn't have an older sibling giving them to him. Phrases like, "Stop it. Ge' ou' uh my face." or "I don't yike dat." or "Heah comes anudder one!" or "I not done yet. Not yet."
(I certainly don't have to worry about her standing up for herself. She will not be bullied...now to just make sure she's not the bully. Yeesh.)

Potty training is going very slowly right now. Amelia Jayne took interest very early on - before she was even 18 months old. I thought it was cute and she was brilliant, so we let her do it when she was interested. Now that we're trying to get more serious (which we've been doing for a couple of months) I just feel like we're having power struggles. She does #2 in the potty very well, but I'll check her pull-up one minute and she's dry so I ask if she needs to go. She says no. Five minutes later it's wet. And she puts up such a fight when I gently ask her or take her to the bathroom. I decided this week to step back for a bit, keep her in pull-ups, keep asking her if she needs to go, but let go of some of the control. Oh, me and my controlling nature. Bless anyone who has to put up with me, especially those in my house. I'm the one who acts like a two year old most days.

I wonder sometimes if that's how God sees us. He knows what's best for us, but we fight it the whole way. He's only trying to make life better and yet we want to do it our own way. And he lets us. That's how amazing He is. I don't know how he does it, but I pray that he'll give me the grace to do the same. I pray that I'll remember his love for me when I'm struggling with my daughter and I'll stop right there and just love her. Isn't that what He does? Isn't that what He did?  His love for us is so great that He gave up his Son for us.

Will I ever stop acting like a 2-year old?